1. Today I feel

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

*Inspired by a Youtuber Simply_Kenna

In this post, I want to share my feelings. Yes, maybe it is more personal. Maybe TMI but I'll try not to. Maybe I would like to make this post series. What do you think? 

Today I feel, envy. 

It is normal. It is makes us human. It's ok to feel it that way but don't let the envy drown you. Too much is never a good thing. Being alive in 20-something, for me, the struggle is real. We can't skip the age of 20. It's a human nature and we have to face it no matter hard it is. 

The emotion that I struggle the most is envy. And it makes me, how ungrateful I am. I'll try to keep in my mind. How ungrateful you are Winny. The number one reason why I got envy is the success of the other. And today is the day that I envy with the success of my friend. I know, I know very well that I can't compare myself with the others because we have different path, stories, background and so on and so on. But I can't help myself. I know the envy must be driven to motivation to become a better person. Yet, I make myself another reason and let the envy drowning me. Please help me! I try to learn how to overcome my envy. My mind makes it difficult but at least I try and keep going on, right? 

So what I learn today is whenever my envy strikes me, I should do this : 
  1. Take a deep breath
  2. Take your time
  3. Be grateful
  4. Accept and embrace it
  5. There's a lot of people not that lucky as you are
  6. Choose happy 
  7. Change your topics with the others to make you forget
  8. Listen and motivate yourself to be a better person 
  9. Describe your feeling through writing 
Well, it works for me, of course it is not that instantly but I give it a try. Me and le bf feel the same way but in different cases. And somehow, I can motivate him and feel much better. Still wondering, why I can motivate le bf, friends and other people yet I can not motivate myself. It's so weird, you know. Am I kinda bullshit? Idk. So, how's your feel today? 

#onrepeat Lean on Me (Glee Cast Version) by Glee Cast

Sometimes in our lives
We all have pain, we all have sorrow
But if we are wise, 
We know that there's always tomorrow

Lean on me when you're not strong
I'll be your friend, I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Till I'm gonna need somebody to lean on

Please swallow your pride
If I have things you need to borrow
For no one can fill those of your needs
That you won't let show

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